Everyone Needs a Ta-Da! Tool Foolโ€™s Stool

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Everyone Needs a Ta-Da

Iโ€™m in the midst of moving right now, and we are trying to make this new home our own. Before we moved, we got rid of a lot of our furniture so that we could โ€œstart freshโ€ or, as I like to call it, โ€œfind a way to send me straight to the chiropractor.โ€

Yes, thatโ€™s right, Iโ€™m in flat-pack hell.

Flat-pack furniture has its place. Sure, itโ€™s cheap. Sure, itโ€™s made out of laminated particleboard, and sure, youโ€™re spending hours of your own time (How much do you make an hour?) to save in overseas labor costs. But the kids need shelving in their closets, and white flat-pack drawers look like built-ins for a fraction of the price.

Iโ€™ve spent the better part of the last week on the floor of my new living room (The carpet doesnโ€™t look nearly as nice as when Iโ€™m standing.) assembling various units. Donโ€™t get me wrongโ€”aside from the lower back trauma from being hunched over for hours at a time, I rather enjoy assembling flat-pack furniture. Itโ€™s like adult Legos but with disastrous consequences, if you do something wrong.

As we all know, particleboard isnโ€™t particularly forgiving.

Flat-pack assembly is the โ€œDonโ€™t step on the carpet because itโ€™s lavaโ€ game but for adults. Plus, when else can you give your kids an accelerated course on the kind of language heโ€™s not going to hear until (hopefully) high school?

As I sat surrounded by cardboard debris, my three-year-old son says, โ€œLook, Daddy! I go between the boxes!โ€

I look up and, sure enough, heโ€™s squeezing between two boxes. Oh, hurrah, my son can suck in his belly, I think. Thatโ€™s a skill heโ€™ll need later in life.

He finishes with a flourish and his hands outstretched, โ€œTa Da!โ€

Yeah. Ta Da. Big whoop, kid. Do you want a round of applause? โ€œGood job, boy. Now go find one of your brothers to annoy.โ€

A bit later I finish my first cabinet. I stand up, stretch my aching back, and call in my wife.

โ€œDone with the first one.โ€

She glanced over. โ€œYep,โ€ and then she just walked away.

It is at this moment that I realize my son was right. Iโ€™m a grown man, but every once in awhile, I still feel the need to say, โ€œTa Da!โ€ Because, damn it, I worked hard on this thing, and you should give it the respect it deserves. Too often you deal with customers who feel like they canโ€™t compliment your work or they risk losing the ability to make changes later. Or they feel youโ€™ll get a big head. I donโ€™t know how they think. Crazyโ€”the lot of them. You often donโ€™t know you did a good job until the referral gets back to you. And that is nice, but itโ€™s not the same as an on-the-spot compliment.

But Iโ€™ll tell you this: Putting together a flat-pack shelf is one thing, creating something from a pile of lumber and a few screws is something else entirely. You deserve a โ€œTa Daโ€ today, and Iโ€™m going to give it to you. Just know that as I finish typing the next words, Iโ€™m slowly standing and starting a round of applause. And yes, my wife thinks Iโ€™m a nut job.

So go ahead. Take your โ€œTa Da.โ€ Youโ€™ve earned it.

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